3 Lessons From a Navy Seal
“Those who live in fear of failure, or hardship, or embarrassment will never achieve their potential.”
― William H. McRaven
Admiral William H. McRaven, a decorated Navy SEAL, transformed a commencement speech into a global phenomenon with his book, Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life...And Maybe the World.
Drawing on his 37 years of military experience, McRaven distills complex life lessons into 10 simple, actionable lessons that, without explanation or context, could be plastered on the wall of a preschool without a second glance. There’s a reason that cliches like “never give up” and “no one achieves success alone” exist. They bear repeating and stand the test of time.
McRaven illustrates these 10 leadership and life skills with compelling stories from his time in training and in war. It’s a quick read with simple but powerful lessons that make you appreciate those protecting us on a daily basis.
3 Takeaways from Make Your Bed
1. “Stop complaining and move forward.”
During SEAL training, instructors could command a soldier to become a "sugar cookie" at any moment, for any reason. This meant the soldier had to plunge into the ocean fully clothed, then roll in the sand until they were completely covered, leaving them wet, uncomfortable, and shivering for the rest of the day.
When Admiral McRaven was ordered to do this for no apparent reason, his instructor—a soldier he deeply respected—told him it was to teach that "life isn’t fair." This instructor, a high-performing triathlete, was someone McRaven admired. A year later, that same instructor was involved in a head-on collision while biking, resulting in a spinal cord injury.
Despite going from peak physical condition to barely being able to move, the instructor never complained or indulged in self-pity. He accepted his fate and moved forward.
He also writes about countless visits he made to U.S. hospitals in Afghanistan and points out that never once did he hear a soldier complain. They were fully accepting of the situation and eager to return to their unit. McRaven writes:
“It is easy to blame your lot in life on some outside force, to stop trying because you believe fate is against you. It is easy to think that where you were raised, how your parents treated you, or what school you went to is all that determines your future. Nothing could be further from the truth. The common people and the great men and women are all defined by how they deal with life’s unfairness: Helen Keller, Nelson Mandela, Stephen Hawking, Malala Yousafzai, and—Moki Martin. Sometimes no matter how hard you try, no matter how good you are, you still end up as a sugar cookie. Don’t complain. Don’t blame it on your misfortune. Stand tall, look to the future, and drive on!”
Complaining reveals key personality traits. It distinguishes those with a growth mindset from those with a fixed one, highlighting who can push through obstacles and who crumbles in the face of them. It's the line between resilience and fragility.
Complain less and do more.
2. “Never ever quit. Never ring the bell.”
SEAL training requires extremely harsh conditions to see who rises to the top. This is especially true during Hell Week where trainees are pushed to the limit with minimal sleep and food and intense workouts and stress. If they are at their breaking point and simply want to sleep and eat some food then all they have to do is ring the bell.
Ringing the bell is a sign of failure in SEAL culture. It’s a single tone that says “I quit.” But, as McRaven says,
“Quitting never makes anything easier.”
Quitting might provide instant satisfaction but it can lead to a lifetime of regret.
3. “Don’t be afraid to fail.”
During SEAL training, McRaven and his swim buddy came in dead last on a swim. The consequence? The circus. Getting added on to the list for “the circus” meant that you were forced to suffer through non-stop workouts and more harassment by the instructors for 2 straight hours at the end of the day. It included obstacle courses, timed swims, timed runs, and whatever else they wanted to torture you with.
The workouts were exhausting but McRaven explains that the worst part was the fatigue. When you were required to fall in line and do the same workouts as the rest of your more-rested counterparts the next day you were more likely to do the circus again. This leads to a “death spiral” and a high likelihood of ringing the bell.
In the case of McRaven and his swim buddy, this death spiral lasted for days. Interestingly though, they got better. Days after the first circus, there was a 5-mile open water swim and the duo actually came in first. Days later they graduated.
“Life is a struggle and the potential for failure is ever present, but those who live in fear of failure, or hardship, or embarrassment will never achieve their potential. Without pushing your limits, without occasionally sliding down the rope headfirst, without daring greatly, you will never know what is truly possible in your life.”
Fear of failure is often worse than failure itself. Maybe this is a natural human trait or maybe it’s a societal issue. Formal education is an easy target but this is where I see it starting from. You are immediately graded, ranked, and limited to one “right” answer and anything creative or unique is brushed aside at best.
Prior to the Industrial Revolution, you were considered a moral failure if you couldn’t sustain a business and were all but outcasted from society. While failure still has strong negative connotations in the 2000s, it’s well-known that most big businesses had plenty of failures before success. Entrepreneurs are basically required to have a list of failures (and things they’ve learned from those failures) to be respected and succeed.
Fail more.
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